First Rule Of Mom Club..

Posted: September 3, 2013 in Uncategorized

Motherhood comes with its own set of rules, like ‘never shake a baby’ or ‘don’t put the baby in the dryer’ or ‘sleep is futile’. But the FIRST rule of Mom Club is: you never judge another mother. Unless she’s wrong. Then you ridicule the HELL out of her behind her back and/or in an online public forum, because how dare she raise her children like that?!?! You’re obviously so much more informed than she. It so clearly states in the Handbook of Being an Awesome Mom that everything that particular mother does is wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong.

Never mind that being a mother is a overwhelming task  horrifying and fulfilling 24/7 job placed upon thrown at us like a flaming ball of shit and NONE of us knows what the hell we are doing. Forget the fact that we all live with this huge boiling pit of endless guilt.love.hate that should bring us together in an eternal bond of sisterhood. Formula feed your baby? How dare you. Breastfeeding? You harlot. Let your toddler watch a half hour of a pointless television show so you can finally sit and have that cup of coffee you poured for yourself two hours ago? What kind of mother are you?

We can’t all be perfect, but heaven forbid you try to hold an open, honest discussion with another mom on how hard it is to be a mother. Sometimes I forget how judgemental other moms can be over even the simple things. I have made the mistake on more than one occasion of sharing an experience only to get the ‘look’ from whoever I’m talking to. You know it we’ve all gotten it from someone. The raised eyebrow usually  followed by a smug shift of body language. The “Oh, you poor, dumb thing” look. I get it, you’re smarter than I am. You have one perfect child that never throws his dinner at the dog or shreds an entire folder of important papers or delights the world with a poop mural he painted on his bedroom wall just for you. I have four kids, all under 6. I don’t get the luxury of color coding their toys by educational value. I consider my day a success if I didn’t lose one of them in a pile of laundry or forget to dress them. I’m just trying to get by how I know best all the while giving them all of the loving patience I can muster. That’s all ANY of us can do. So the next time you are talking to another mom in the park, online, or in the doctors office try to remember to have a little compassion.

My new first rule of Mom Club is this: Don’t be a dick.

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Comments
  1. YOU ARE MY HERO!!! I just clicked over here from the View From The Couch blog, I loved your comment on the FYI post. I can’t agree more about how mom’s are with each other! When I first started reading blogs I made the mistake of thinking that everyone posted like my dear sweet cousin, a Catholic homeschooling mom with three children between 6-10, and at the time pregnant with baby number four. Now, she is still a homeschooling mom but just gave birth to twins! Mom o’six, at home with the kids all day long and she spouts nothing but sunshine and rainbows! Bless her heart… I made the rounds, found some blogs on breastfeeding and cloth diapering thinking “these have GOT to be a group of open-minded ladies, right?” WRONG!!! Evil beotches looking to cut each other apart!!!
    You just keep doing what you do, I’ll follow 😉

    • notanotherfuckingmomblog says:

      Haha well thanks! You just made my day AND you won the “First Commenter on this Blog, EVER” award.
      (..There’s not an actual award, other than the pride of knowing you popped my blog cherry. But that in and of itself is a pretty fulfilling awesome, don’t ya think? 🙂 )

      I too was unaware of the cutthroat world of mommy bloggers until I actually started following a few. Boy was I in for it. It is RIDICULOUS how hateful some of those women can be. It’s normal judgy, asshole mom syndrome x1000 when they are behind the safety of their computer monitors. Thank goodness for the rays of sunshine out there or it would be a complete waste of time. Thanks for stopping by, mucho xoxo for that. I hope I can live up to expectations. 😉

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